Skip navigation

Monthly Archives: April 2009

So what do you do?  At home, how many loads of laundry do you do a day?  Do you always have dinner ready at a certain time?  Must you mop everyday, or once a week?  And what about you, how you dress, do you do your hair and makeup every day, and what about even getting a shower on a daily basis?

These are just a few of the questions I receive from other wives and mothers wondering how to order their days.  This is a concept that has taken me years to understand.  I fell for the “Martha Mentality”.  You know, the thought that I can be perfect at everything I do and always be on top of things,  Just like Martha.  What I never took into account is the many people she has working for her, behind the scenes.  Yes, if  life came pre-measured and prepped, cleaned up and primped, I could do it all with ease.  However, was it ever God’s will that my home be perfect? I knew I had a huge issue with this when someone told me my home looked “lived in”.  Lived in?  LiVeD In?  I thought this was one of the most offensive things I had been told, I spent so much time cleaning and organizing, all to have my house look “lived in”?  That’s when God showed me the pride spilling out of me about our home.  I always chose cleaning over playing, I would even say no to friends who wanted to get together, because then the house would be too messy.  I realized that my ministry is to my family and to other PEOPLE…not to my house!

What is my role as a wife and mother?  If I stay home all day, What is the expectation of my day?  What should be my top priorities of each day?  Alas, the answer is all too easy, yet taking the answer and applying it everyday is the most difficult part for me.

Be busy seeking God.  Intentionally imitate Christ.  Create an environment where the Holy Spirit can work in the lives of you and your family.  That is my calling.  Wow…no list of to-do’s to check off as I go?  Sure keeping a home in working order falls into place here, but seeking God is the focus.  Imitating Christ is the goal.  Seeing the Holy Spirit at work in our lives is the result.  Not the kudos from visitors on the polished look of a house.  So how?  Here are a few things I’ve learned to do,

Meet with God.  Meet with him in prayer, study and worship.  If this is the only thing you accomplish in a day, meet with Him.  Invite God into your home and ask him to help you order your time. Understand that you can continue your conversation with him ALL day.

Know your family, understand what helps them function well through the day and what stresses them out.  For my husband, one of the ways I can bless him is by making the phone calls he asked me to make.  I could procrastinate all day on that one task, cook a fabulous meal and have  a spotless house, but the biggest blessing to him would have been the calls being made and mac and cheese and a messy house.  That is one example. Go the extra mile and ask “How can I bless you today?”  And actually do it!  I tend to be quite the procrastinator, so for me this helps me remember to focus on one key thing that I can do that day that is out of the ordinary busy work.

Pray.  Pray for your children as you fold their clothes,  pray for their future as you tidy their rooms, pray for the choices they make at school as you file their homework.  So many things we do throughout the day can be accompanied by prayer, and what an impact that makes in the lives of our loved ones.  Keep scripture in a highly visible place in your kitchen, at the sink or above the stove, so that you can pray that scripture while doing dishes or making dinner. Pray out loud with your children as you drive them to school, this will be a blessing that will stay with them through the day.

Pray for your husband the same.  Pray for the future of your family as you prepare meals and clean up from them.  Pray for the future spouse of your child while you prepare special events, asking God for a full and joyful home in the future.

Set the atmosphere.  Help create a playful atmosphere when it its time to be playful, and a serene atmosphere when it is time to rest.  For some reason women set the tone of the home weather we mean to or not, so be intentional about how you set the stage.  The best days for me are those where the home is set to the atmosphere of peace and rest, since that is what I often view our home as, a place to find peace and rest.

Teach your children.  Play with them, show them how to love and how to enjoy life.  Dance with them and paint with them.  Teach them to cook, read with them.  Spend time loving on them, they will remember it for the rest of their lives and that is what they can pass down to your grandchildren.  Dishes won’t even remember being dirty, let alone the fact that you cleaned them.

Be passionate.  Find out what God gifted you to do and do it with passion.  Love the lord with ALL your heart soul strength.  Pass that on to your kids.  Talk about your faith with them at home and when you are out.  Impress it on them.(see Deut.6:4-9)

So maybe my floors aren’t mopped every day, or every week for that matter.  So maybe my home looks “lived in”.   So if you come by and see the lack of perfection in my home just know, it is because I have spent more time with The Lord and the ones I love than I have spent with the cleaning rags…and that is the joy I have found in everyday life!